Relationships and Community on Gossip

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Dealing with Conflict Directly

Author

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 10:12, 2 Timothy 2:24-25, Romans 12:17-18, James 1:19-20, Proverbs 25:11-12, Galatians 6:1, Matthew 18:15

If someone has done something wrong even at a personal level, the right thing to do is not to gossip about it, not to tell everybody else, not to allow resentment to build up and fester, and certainly...

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O Lord, We marvel that you would take

Author

Barbara Duguid

Scripture

Colossians 3:12-14, Romans 12:2, 1 John 1:9, Ephesians 2:14-16, Romans 5:8, 1 Peter 2:24

O Lord, We marvel that you would take on flesh and blood in order to be crucified, killed, and buried for us. You humbled yourself and submitted to the hatred of sinful men, accepting the thorns, the ...

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What is Fellowship?

Author

James I. Packer

Keywords

Scripture

Acts 2:42-47, 1 John 1:3, Hebrews 10:24-25, 1 John 1:7, Romans 12:4-5, Galatians 6:2, 1 Corinthians 1:9

What is meant by fellowship in this verse? Gossip? Cups of tea? Tours? No. What is being referred to is something of a quite different order and on a quite different level. “They met constantly to hea...

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All the Knowledge in the World

Author

Clifton Fadiman

Keywords

Scripture

James 1:19, Matthew 7:3-5, Romans 12:3

At a dinner party, [The Scottish playwright George Bernard] Shaw sat next to a young man who proved to be a bore of historic proportions. After suffering through a seemingly interminable monologue, Sh...

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Who Determines Your Behavior?

Author

The Pastor's Workshop

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:1, Matthew 5:44, Proverbs 15:1, 1 Peter 3:9, Luke 6:31, Galatians 6:9, Colossians 3:12-13, 1 Corinthians 13:4-5, Genesis 50:20, Philippians 2:3-4, James 1:19-20, 1 Samuel 24:17

Some years ago, the syndicated newspaper columnist Sidney J. Harris shared an interesting anecdote from one of his friends. Each evening, this friend would stop at the same newsstand to buy a newspape...

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Monkeys & Comparison

Author

Brian Zahnd

Keywords

Scripture

2 Corinthians 10:12, Ecclesiastes 4:4, Romans 12:6, Philippians 2:3, 1 Corinthians 12:18-20, Proverbs 14:30, James 3:16

In their book Friend and Foe, social psychologists Adam Galinsky and Maurice Schweitzer cite a study by Emory University scientist Frans de Waal regarding comparison. De Waal trained capuchin monkeys ...

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The Conversational Topper

Author

Stuart R. Strachan, Jr.

Keywords

Scripture

James 1:9, Philippians 2:3-4, Proverbs 3:18, Romans 12:15, James 1:19

Have you ever been guilty of being a “conversational topper”? The topper is someone who, when another confides a challenge or shares an exciting event, immediately connects that event to their own li...

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Author

Ursula K. Le Guin

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:1-2, Matthew 5:14-16, Micah 6:8, Isaiah 1:17, James 4:17

If your voice is heard by more people because you've earned some kind of name and fame, your silence on an issue of urgent moral importance is even more of a betrayal. Privilege is obligation.

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Koinonitus

Author

John Ortberg

Keywords

Scripture

Ezekiel 47:9, Galatians 6:2, Romans 12:4-5, Matthew 28:19-20, 1 John 1:7

The ancient Greek word for intimate fellowship is koinonia. In the church, we can suffer from what might be called koinonitus: fellowship turned in on itself; cliques and enclaves and tight-knit group...

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The Fruit of a Productive Disagreement

Author

Buster Benson

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 17:22, Romans 12:10, Proverbs 27:17, Proverbs 15:22, Matthew 11:15

A productive disagreement yields fruit: the fruit of security, by removing a threat, reducing a risk, resulting in a deal, or concluding with a decision; the fruit of growth, by revealing new informat...

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Author

Ambrose of Milan

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 6:14-15, Proverbs 20:22, Colossians 3:12-13, Romans 12:19, 1 Peter 3:9, Ephesians 4:31-32, Matthew 5:44

No one heals himself by wounding another.

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Anxiety in Disagreements

Author

Buster Benson

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:44, Colossians 3:12-13, Proverbs 29:11, 2 Timothy 2:23-24, Romans 12:18

Anxiety sparks when a perspective we value bumps into another perspective that challenges it in some way. If we find this new perspective to be unacceptable, that’s when our “Someone is wrong on the i...

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Disease is a Breakdown of Conversation in Our Bodies

Author

C. Christopher Smith

Keywords

Scripture

1 Corinthians 12:12-14, Romans 12:4-5, Ephesians 4:15-16, 1 Corinthians 1:10-17, James 3:5-6

Our bodies, created in the image of the Triune God, have much to teach us about the virtues of conversation. The human body is a wondrous symphony of diverse parts: 206 bones and over 600 muscles, con...

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Trust and Belonging

Author

Stanley Hauerwas

Keywords

Scripture

Acts 2:42-47, 1 Thessalonians 5:11-15, 1 Corinthians 12:27, Romans 12:4-5, Galatians 6:2

We were created to communicate, to speak truth fully to one another, so that we might be members of one another. To be members of one another means we must learn to trust one another. Trust, like trut...

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Author

Bertrand Russell

Keywords

Assumptions

Scripture

Luke 10:25-37, Acts 17:11, Romans 12:2, James 1:5, Psalm 119:59-60, Psalm 10:1

In all affairs, it’s a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.

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Defending the Truth

Author

Richard J. Mouw

Keywords

Scripture

Exodus 20:16 , Zechariah 8:16–17, Leviticus 19:17–18, Ephesians 4:15, Romans 12:17–18, Psalm 15:1–3

I once had the opportunity to speak briefly to a large Mormon audience at the Tabernacle in Salt Lake City. I told them that I feel badly about the fact that we evangelicals often tell Mormons what th...

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Living in Outrage Heaven

Author

Tim Kreider

Keywords

Scripture

Psalm 37:8, Colossians 3:8, Galatians 5:22-23, Romans 12:17-18, Matthew 7:1-2

The political cartoonist and Op-Ed writer Tim Kreider has provided us with some insight into the “world of outrage” we currently inhabit. A world that has been amplified by the dawn of the Internet an...

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A Few Minutes or an Hour?

Author

Stuart R. Strachan, Jr.

Keywords

Scripture

2 Corinthians 4:7, Psalm 27:4, Romans 12:2, John 15:5, Isaiah 30:15

Tallulah Bankhead (1903-1968) was a flamboyant actress, whom one critic called “more an act than an actress.” She was also known for her extreme talkativeness. One day after an interview, the intervie...

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Author

John Milton

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:5, Jeremiah 9:23-24, Galatians 5:19-21, 1 Peter 3:9, Philippians 2:3-4, Romans 12:19, Proverbs 16:18

But what will not Ambition and Revenge Descend to? Who aspires must down as low As high he sor’d, obnoxious first or last To basest things.

Quote

Author

Eleanor Doan

Keywords

Scripture

1 John 4:7-8, Luke 19:1-10, Matthew 8:5-13, Proverbs 25:21-22, Romans 12:20-21, Luke 6:27-28, Matthew 5:43-44

Love your enemy-it will drive him nuts.

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Innovation or Heresy

Author

Stuart R. Strachan, Jr.

Keywords

Scripture

Ecclesiastes 7:10, Colossians 2:8, Matthew 9:17, 1 Thessalonians 5:21, Romans 12:2, Mark 7:8-9, Isaiah 43:19

It’s funny how sometimes members of the church can associate anything new with “heresy.” We often make the mistake of confusing technological innovations or scientific discoveries for changes to the g...

liturgy

Almighty God, harsh words and personal

Author

Laura B. Murray

Keywords

Scripture

1 Peter 3:9, Matthew 5:5, Romans 12:17-19, Colossians 3:12-14, Proverbs 15:1, Matthew 5:44, Ephesians 4:29, Proverbs 18:21, Matthew 12:36

Almighty God, harsh words and personal attacks can bring out the worst in us. We find ourselves spending energy on thoughts of retaliation and plans to protect ourselves. Father forgive us. We long to...

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The Boodle Feast

Author

Rick Love

Keywords

Scripture

John 13:34-35, Galatians 3:28, 1 Peter 4:9, Matthew 25:35, Luke 14:12-14, Romans 12:13, Hebrews 13:2

In his helpful book Peace Catalysts , Rick Love shares a poignant example of how sharing a meal can break down the familiar walls of status, power, and economics: In 2011, my wife, Fran, and I we...

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Bitterness only Hurts Ourselves

Author

R. T. Kendall

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:19, Matthew 6:14-15, Ephesians 4:31-32, Colossians 3:13, Luke 6:37, Romans 12:17-21, 1 Peter 3:9

When we are bitter, we delude ourselves into thinking that those who hurt us are more likely to be punished as long as we are set on revenge. We are afraid to let go of those feelings. After all, if w...

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A Failure to Appreciate the Other’s Point of View

Author

John Stott

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 18:13, Matthew 18:16, Romans 12:18, Proverbs 20:3, Matthew 5:24

Most quarrels are due to a misunderstanding, and the misunderstanding is due to our failure to appreciate the other person’s point of view. It is more natural to us to talk than to listen, to argue th...

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The Nebulous "They"

Author

The Pastor's Workshop

Keywords

Scripture

Galatians 1:10, Colossians 3:23, Psalm 139:13-14, Proverbs 29:25, Romans 8:31, 1 Thessalonians 2:4, 1 Samuel 16:7, Romans 12:2, John 1:12

George Herbert Mead, an influential early 20th-century sociologist, coined the term “generalized other” to describe the vague group we consider when shaping our actions. How often do we behave a certa...

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Preventing Vengeance

Author

Mia Levetan

Keywords

Scripture

Genesis 4:8–15, Exodus 21:23–25, Micah 6:6–8 , Matthew 5:38–45, Romans 12:17–21, Psalm 46:9–10

I did some of my Clinical Pastoral Education Units in Gastonia. One of the units that I served was the Emergency Department. If there was an incident that was suspected to be gang related, they would ...

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How Do Porcupines Cuddle?

Keywords

Scripture

1 Corinthians 13:4-7, Philippians 2:3-4, Proverbs 15:1, Colossians 3:12-13, Ephesians 4:2-3, Romans 12:18

The furniture salesman said the couch would seat five friends without a problem. Then I realized, I don’t have five friends without a problem. Old joke—sorry—but still. It reminds me of the old saying...

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Emotional Nanocrafts in the Space Between Us

Author

The Pastor's Workshop

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:10, Revelation 3:20, Matthew 25:40, Luke 8:43-48, Song of Solomon 2:14, Psalm 42:7

In I’d Like You More If You Were More Like Me , John Ortberg uses an interesting analogy for an aspect of our relationships. In 2015, Stephen Hawking and Yuri Milner announced the Starshot Initiati...

liturgy

Prayer for Times of Conflict

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:9, Romans 12:17-18, Psalm 34:14, Ephesians 4:2-3, John 14:27, Romans 14:19, 2 Corinthians 13:11, James 3:18, Isaiah 26:3, Philippians 4:6-7

O God, you have bound us together in a common life. Help us, in the midst of our struggles for justice and truth, to confront one another without hatred or bitterness, and to work together with mutual...

relationships and community on Gossip

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