Relationships and Community on Envy

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Monkeys & Comparison

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2 Corinthians 10:12, Ecclesiastes 4:4, Romans 12:6, Philippians 2:3, 1 Corinthians 12:18-20, Proverbs 14:30, James 3:16

In their book Friend and Foe, social psychologists Adam Galinsky and Maurice Schweitzer cite a study by Emory University scientist Frans de Waal regarding comparison. De Waal trained capuchin monkeys ...

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Author

Eleanor Doan

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Scripture

1 John 4:7-8, Luke 19:1-10, Matthew 8:5-13, Proverbs 25:21-22, Romans 12:20-21, Luke 6:27-28, Matthew 5:43-44

Love your enemy-it will drive him nuts.

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Author

John Milton

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Scripture

Matthew 5:5, Jeremiah 9:23-24, Galatians 5:19-21, 1 Peter 3:9, Philippians 2:3-4, Romans 12:19, Proverbs 16:18

But what will not Ambition and Revenge Descend to? Who aspires must down as low As high he sor’d, obnoxious first or last To basest things.

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Author

David Brooks

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Scripture

Psalm 147:6, Galatians 5:22-23, Romans 12:16, 1 Corinthians 13:4-5, Matthew 11:29

Humility is freedom from the need to prove you are superior all the time, but egotism is a ravenous hunger in a small space—self-concerned, competitive, and distinction-hungry. Humility is infused wit...

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God our Father We confess to you and to

Author

Jacob Traeger

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Scripture

James 1:19-20, Proverbs 15:1, Romans 12:17-21, Matthew 5:38-39, Luke 6:35-36, Matthew 18:21-35, Matthew 5:43-44, 1 Peter 3:9, Genesis 45:4-8

God our Father We confess to you and to one another That we have been quick to anger And slow to mercy We have paid back abuse with abuse Hatred with hatred And violence with violence The world does n...

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Almighty God, harsh words and personal

Author

Laura B. Murray

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Scripture

1 Peter 3:9, Matthew 5:5, Romans 12:17-19, Colossians 3:12-14, Proverbs 15:1, Matthew 5:44, Ephesians 4:29, Proverbs 18:21, Matthew 12:36

Almighty God, harsh words and personal attacks can bring out the worst in us. We find ourselves spending energy on thoughts of retaliation and plans to protect ourselves. Father forgive us. We long to...

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Empathy Defined

Author

Richard J. Mouw

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Scripture

Exodus 23:9, Job 2:11–13, Isaiah 58:6–7 , Hebrews 4:15, Romans 12:15 , Psalm 103:13–14

“Empathy” literally means “in-feeling”—it is to project myself into another person’s feelings so that I begin to understand what it is like to have his experiences. If I want to gain empathy for a nei...

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The Nebulous "They"

Author

The Pastor's Workshop

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Scripture

Galatians 1:10, Colossians 3:23, Psalm 139:13-14, Proverbs 29:25, Romans 8:31, 1 Thessalonians 2:4, 1 Samuel 16:7, Romans 12:2, John 1:12

George Herbert Mead, an influential early 20th-century sociologist, coined the term “generalized other” to describe the vague group we consider when shaping our actions. How often do we behave a certa...

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The Perfect (Mythical) Woman

Author

Richella J. Parham

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Scripture

Genesis 6:4-5, 2 Corinthians 10:12, Romans 12:6-8, 1 Corinthians 12:12-14, Psalm 139:14, Romans 12:4-5, Philippians 4:11-13

In her excellent little book (Mythical Me), Richella Parham begins by describing a single event that led to a personal journey into addressing her struggles with comparison. Having recently moved to a...

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Loving Father, You receive all who come

Author

Memorial Drive Presbyterian Church

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Scripture

Matthew 23:11-13, Luke 14:7-11, Colossians 3:23-24, Ephesians 4:2, Proverbs 3:34, Philippians 2:13, Romans 12:1

Loving Father, You receive all who come humbly before You. Yet we approach You far too often with much satisfaction and inappropriate pride. We think more highly of ourselves than we ought to think. W...

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Bitterness only Hurts Ourselves

Author

R. T. Kendall

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:19, Matthew 6:14-15, Ephesians 4:31-32, Colossians 3:13, Luke 6:37, Romans 12:17-21, 1 Peter 3:9

When we are bitter, we delude ourselves into thinking that those who hurt us are more likely to be punished as long as we are set on revenge. We are afraid to let go of those feelings. After all, if w...

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Author

William Blake

Keywords

Scripture

1 John 4:10-11, John 13:1-17, Romans 12:9-10, John 15:12-13, Philippians 2:3-4, 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love seeketh not Itself to please, Nor for itself hath any care; But for another gives its ease, And builds a Heaven in Hell’s despair. So sung a little Clod of Clay, Trodden with the cattle’s feet; B...

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How We Become Peacemakers

Author

Jerry Bridges

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:9, James 4:1-2, Ephesians 4:31-32, Colossians 3:12-13, Romans 12:18, 1 John 2:9-11

To become peacemakers, then, we must begin with ourselves. We must ask ourselves, “Why do I make cutting remarks to another person? Why do I make demeaning remarks about them?” We must also ask oursel...

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Contempt, a Prayer of Confession

Author

Lisa Ann Moss Degrenia

Keywords

Scripture

Luke 4:21-30, Mark 6:1-6, Matthew 5:44, Colossians 3:12-13, James 4:11, 1 Peter 2:1, Romans 12:10

Contempt is so painful To be dismissed, disregarded Questioning instead of dignity Accusation instead of personhood I have felt its sting and hollowness As have you, my Jesus Help me hear the needed ...

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Revenge Doesn’t Say

Author

Miroslav Volf

Keywords

Scripture

Leviticus 24:19-21, Romans 12:17-21, 1 Peter 3:9, Matthew 5:38-39, Proverbs 24:29, Matthew 26:52-54, Deuteronomy 32:35

In Exclusion and Embrace , Yale professor Miroslav Volf reflects on the themes of revenge, mercy, forgiveness and grace. Volf, who grew up in war-ravaged Croatia, speaks from a place of deep concer...

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Heavenly Father, we confess that in our pursuit

Author

Allen Thompson

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 6:25-34, Luke 12:22-32, James 4:8, 1 Corinthians 10:31, Psalm 115:1, Romans 12:2

Heavenly Father, we confess that in our pursuit of good, we often miss opportunities to bring you honor and glory. We try to address our shortcomings by compensating for them, rather than by orienting...

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Who are You to Think You are Better than Our Lord?

Author

Madeline L'Engle

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:18, John 15:9-17

While exploring an experience of deep guilt and shame with her spiritual director, the author of Madeleine L’Engle, wrote One time I was talking to Canon Tallis, who is my spiritual director as we...

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Living in Outrage Heaven

Author

Tim Kreider

Keywords

Scripture

Psalm 37:8, Colossians 3:8, Galatians 5:22-23, Romans 12:17-18, Matthew 7:1-2

The political cartoonist and Op-Ed writer Tim Kreider has provided us with some insight into the “world of outrage” we currently inhabit. A world that has been amplified by the dawn of the Internet an...

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Author

Thomas à Kempis

Keywords

Scripture

2 Corinthians 5:15, Colossians 3:1-2, Romans 12:1, John 15:4-5, Philippians 3:7-8, Galatians 2:20, Matthew 6:33

Let this be thy whole Endeavour, this thy prayer, this thy desire, that thou mayest be stripped of all selfishness, and with entire simplicity follow Jesus only.

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Author

Minucius Felix

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Scripture

1 Peter 4:8, 1 Samuel 18:20, Acts 2:42-47, Ephesians 4:2-3, Romans 12:10, 1 John 4:20-21

Our bond, which you resent, consists in mutual love, for we know not how to hate; we call ourselves ‘brethren’ to which you object, as members of one family in God, as partners in one faith, as joint ...

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LORD, too often we live for ourselves

Author

Austin D. Hill

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Scripture

Philippians 2:13, Micah 6:8, Ephesians 4:22-24, Isaiah 55:7, Psalm 51:10-12, Matthew 6:33, Romans 12:2

LORD, too often we live for ourselves instead of how You have called us. Please forgive us for the times when we don’t strive to bring about Your kingdom here and now. Forgive us for the lack of imagi...

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Heavenly Father, we come before Your

Author

Memorial Drive Presbyterian Church

Keywords

Scripture

2 Corinthians 5:17, Matthew 6:14, Titus 3:5, Ephesians 1:7, Romans 12:2

Heavenly Father, we come before Your throne of grace to confess our sin. We have been selfish instead of generous; we have been proud instead of humble; we have held grudges instead of forgiving; we h...

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True Love

Author

Lisa Ann Moss Degrenia

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:1, Isaiah 58:10, Philippians 2:3-4, Matthew 20:26-28, 1 Timothy 6:17-19, Luke 9:23

Merciful Jesus Give us courage to deny privilege to lay down favor and safety in order to take up the cross of opportunity and justice Too often we fail to do this Merciful Jesus Give us courage to d...

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Contempt, a Prayer of Confession

Author

Lisa Ann Moss Degrenia

Keywords

Scripture

Ephesians 4:31-32, Matthew 5:44, Colossians 3:12-13, James 4:11, 1 Peter 2:1, Romans 12:10

Contempt is so painful To be dismissed, disregarded Questioning instead of dignity Accusation instead of personhood I have felt its sting and hollowness As have you, my Jesus Help me hear the needed m...

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A Failure to Appreciate the Other’s Point of View

Author

John Stott

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 18:13, Matthew 18:16, Romans 12:18, Proverbs 20:3, Matthew 5:24

Most quarrels are due to a misunderstanding, and the misunderstanding is due to our failure to appreciate the other person’s point of view. It is more natural to us to talk than to listen, to argue th...

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Author

Bob Goff

Keywords

Scripture

1 John 4:20-21, Luke 19:1-10, Matthew 8:5-13, Luke 10:25-37, Proverbs 25:21-22, Romans 12:20-21

Jesus said to love our enemies. I thought I’d get off easy because I don’t have any real “enemies.” I mean, I’m not mad at North Korea or Russia or China. And I don’t think they’re mad at me. After al...

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O Lord, We marvel that you would take

Author

Barbara Duguid

Scripture

Colossians 3:12-14, Romans 12:2, 1 John 1:9, Ephesians 2:14-16, Romans 5:8, 1 Peter 2:24

O Lord, We marvel that you would take on flesh and blood in order to be crucified, killed, and buried for us. You humbled yourself and submitted to the hatred of sinful men, accepting the thorns, the ...

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Anxiety in Disagreements

Author

Buster Benson

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:44, Colossians 3:12-13, Proverbs 29:11, 2 Timothy 2:23-24, Romans 12:18

Anxiety sparks when a perspective we value bumps into another perspective that challenges it in some way. If we find this new perspective to be unacceptable, that’s when our “Someone is wrong on the i...

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The Echo of an Argument

Author

John Ortberg

Keywords

Scripture

2 Corinthians 5:18, Psalm 34:18, Romans 12:18, James 1:19-20, Proverbs 15:1, Matthew 6:14-15, Colossians 3:13

Philip Yancey writes of a friend whose marriage was choked by hostility. One night the friend reached the breaking point: “I hate you!” he screamed at his wife. “I won’t take it any more. I’ve had eno...

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What Drives Success?

Author

Donald Miller

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 6:25-34, Galatians 1:10, Philippians 2:3-4, Matthew 23:1-12, Romans 12:2

In his book, Scary Close , Donald Miller acknowledges that over time he developed a mask, or a persona that kept even those closest to him from experiencing with him. As he began to peel back layers ...

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