Relationships and Community on Discomfort

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Author

Keywords

Scripture

1 Corinthians 1:27, Romans 12:15, Luke 4:18-19, Psalm 34:18, James 1:27

God bless us with discomfort at easy answers, half-truths and superficial relationships, so that we may live deep within our hearts. God bless us with righteous anger at injustice, oppression, and exp...

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Consolation Defined

Author

Stuart R. Strachan, Jr.

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Scripture

2 Corinthians 1:3-4, Romans 12:15, Isaiah 41:10, Psalm 34:18, Matthew 5:4, Psalm 46:1, 1 Thessalonians 5:11, Ruth 1:16-18, John 11:32-35, John 14:1-4

The etymology of certain words can profoundly enrich our understanding and experience of life. Consider the word “consolation.” Its roots lie in the Latin words “con-” meaning “ “to be ” and “solus,...

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Anxiety in Disagreements

Author

Buster Benson

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:44, Colossians 3:12-13, Proverbs 29:11, 2 Timothy 2:23-24, Romans 12:18

Anxiety sparks when a perspective we value bumps into another perspective that challenges it in some way. If we find this new perspective to be unacceptable, that’s when our “Someone is wrong on the i...

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A Failure to Appreciate the Other’s Point of View

Author

John Stott

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 18:13, Matthew 18:16, Romans 12:18, Proverbs 20:3, Matthew 5:24

Most quarrels are due to a misunderstanding, and the misunderstanding is due to our failure to appreciate the other person’s point of view. It is more natural to us to talk than to listen, to argue th...

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Living in Outrage Heaven

Author

Tim Kreider

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Scripture

Psalm 37:8, Colossians 3:8, Galatians 5:22-23, Romans 12:17-18, Matthew 7:1-2

The political cartoonist and Op-Ed writer Tim Kreider has provided us with some insight into the “world of outrage” we currently inhabit. A world that has been amplified by the dawn of the Internet an...

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Author

Pope Francis

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Scripture

Romans 12:13, Proverbs 19:17, Isaiah 58:10, Galatians 6:2, 1 John 3:17-18, James 2:15-17

Like the Good Samaritan, may we not be ashamed of touching the wounds of those who suffer, but try to heal them with concrete acts of love.

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The Fruit of a Productive Disagreement

Author

Buster Benson

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Scripture

Proverbs 17:22, Romans 12:10, Proverbs 27:17, Proverbs 15:22, Matthew 11:15

A productive disagreement yields fruit: the fruit of security, by removing a threat, reducing a risk, resulting in a deal, or concluding with a decision; the fruit of growth, by revealing new informat...

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Dwelling with Those We Love

Author

The Pastor's Workshop

Keywords

Scripture

Genesis 37:45, Numbers 12:, Ruth 1:4, Romans 12:9–21, Matthew 18:21–35, Psalm 133:

An Irish church once had a humorous yet insightful motto that gets at the heart of the pain that often accompanies our relationships: “To dwell above with those we love will certainly be glory. But to...

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Tearing the Leech Off

Author

Gary Preston

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 6:14-15, Ephesians 4:31-32, Colossians 3:13, Romans 12:17-21, 1 Peter 3:9, Proverbs 19:11, Luke 17:3-4

There’s a story about a traveler making his way with a guide through the jungles of Burma. They came to a shallow but wide river and waded through it to the other side. When the traveler came out of t...

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Contempt, a Prayer of Confession

Author

Lisa Ann Moss Degrenia

Keywords

Scripture

Luke 4:21-30, Mark 6:1-6, Matthew 5:44, Colossians 3:12-13, James 4:11, 1 Peter 2:1, Romans 12:10

Contempt is so painful To be dismissed, disregarded Questioning instead of dignity Accusation instead of personhood I have felt its sting and hollowness As have you, my Jesus Help me hear the needed ...

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Almighty God, too often we settle for

Author

Laura B. Murray

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:18, Psalm 51:10, Isaiah 1:17, James 2:13, Micah 6:8, Matthew 5:6

Almighty God, too often we settle for brokenness in our lives. Rather than offering forgiveness, we hold onto offense. Rather than pursuing justice, we turn away . Rather than offering mercy, we c...

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Koinonitus

Author

John Ortberg

Keywords

Scripture

Ezekiel 47:9, Galatians 6:2, Romans 12:4-5, Matthew 28:19-20, 1 John 1:7

The ancient Greek word for intimate fellowship is koinonia. In the church, we can suffer from what might be called koinonitus: fellowship turned in on itself; cliques and enclaves and tight-knit group...

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Dealing with Conflict Directly

Author

N. T. Wright

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 10:12, 2 Timothy 2:24-25, Romans 12:17-18, James 1:19-20, Proverbs 25:11-12, Galatians 6:1, Matthew 18:15

If someone has done something wrong even at a personal level, the right thing to do is not to gossip about it, not to tell everybody else, not to allow resentment to build up and fester, and certainly...

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The Nebulous "They"

Author

The Pastor's Workshop

Keywords

Scripture

Galatians 1:10, Colossians 3:23, Psalm 139:13-14, Proverbs 29:25, Romans 8:31, 1 Thessalonians 2:4, 1 Samuel 16:7, Romans 12:2, John 1:12

George Herbert Mead, an influential early 20th-century sociologist, coined the term “generalized other” to describe the vague group we consider when shaping our actions. How often do we behave a certa...

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Technology's impact on our Minds

Author

Ruth Haley Barton

Keywords

Scripture

Exodus 20:8-11, 1 Kings 19:11-13, Ecclesiastes 2:22-23 , Luke 10:38-42 , Romans 12:2 , Psalm 46:10

As we become more intentional about living according to our deepest desires, it becomes increasingly important to notice the effects of technology on our mind, our soul and our relationships. The ...

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Author

Tod E. Bolsinger

Keywords

Scripture

Psalm 15:1-2, Ephesians 4:15, 2 Corinthians 1:12, Colossians 3:12-14, Romans 12:9-10

Relational congruence is the ability to be fundamentally the same person with the same values in every relationship, in every circumstance and especially amidst crisis. It is the internal capacity to ...

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Author

David Brooks

Keywords

Scripture

Psalm 147:6, Galatians 5:22-23, Romans 12:16, 1 Corinthians 13:4-5, Matthew 11:29

Humility is freedom from the need to prove you are superior all the time, but egotism is a ravenous hunger in a small space—self-concerned, competitive, and distinction-hungry. Humility is infused wit...

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Rosa Parks & Helpful Comparisons

Author

Richella J. Parham

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:2, Luke 4:18-19, Ecclesiastes 3:7-8, Amos 5:24, Proverbs 31:8-9, Micah 6:8, Isaiah 1:17

Very often, comparison to an ideal is a helpful practice, not a harmful one. Helpful comparisons are those that place a normal or ideal condition on one side of a scale and a real-life condition on th...

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Author

Blaise Pascal

Keywords

Scripture

Philippians 3:13-14, Romans 12:18, Colossians 3:13, James 5:16, 2 Corinthians 5:17, Psalm 147:3

Time heals griefs and quarrels, for we change and are no longer the same persons. Neither the offender nor the offended are any more themselves.

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Author

Anne Lamott

Keywords

Scripture

1 John 1:9, James 5:16, Romans 12:17-18, Mark 11:25, Luke 6:37, Colossians 3:13

Earth is Forgiveness School. You might as well start at the dinner table. That way, you can do this work in comfortable pants.

liturgy

Contempt, a Prayer of Confession

Author

Lisa Ann Moss Degrenia

Keywords

Scripture

Ephesians 4:31-32, Matthew 5:44, Colossians 3:12-13, James 4:11, 1 Peter 2:1, Romans 12:10

Contempt is so painful To be dismissed, disregarded Questioning instead of dignity Accusation instead of personhood I have felt its sting and hollowness As have you, my Jesus Help me hear the needed m...

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Author

Thomas Keating

Keywords

Scripture

Ephesians 4:32, Romans 12:10, Colossians 3:12-14, Galatians 6:2, Philippians 2:3-4

The kingdom is present not in grandiose accomplishments, but in showing practical love in humble ways, day after day, and in refusing to allow our failures and disappointments to hide God’s love from ...

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The Happiness Effect

Author

Craig Detweiler

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:15, John 16:33, Matthew 5:4, Psalm 34:18, Ecclesiastes 3:4

After surveying an incredibly diverse cross section of college students across America, Donna Freitas found “the most pressing social media issues students face: the importance of appearing happy”—and...

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Author

Ronald A. Heifetz, Marty Linsky, Alexander Grashow

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 19:11, Romans 12:21, Isaiah 50:7, Nehemiah 6:3, Galatians 1:10

When you take "personal" attacks personally, you unwittingly conspire in one of the common ways you can be taken out of action-you make yourself the issue. Attacks may be personal, understan...

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Author

Martin Luther

Keywords

Attacks

Scripture

2 Thessalonians 3:3, Romans 12:12, Psalm 91:4-5, 2 Corinthians 10:4-5, James 4:7, Matthew 6:13, 1 Peter 5:8-9

We Christians must be armed and expect every day to be under continuous attack. . . . At such times our only help and comfort is to run here and seize hold of the Lord’s Prayer and speak to God from o...

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Preventing Vengeance

Author

Mia Levetan

Keywords

Scripture

Genesis 4:8–15, Exodus 21:23–25, Micah 6:6–8 , Matthew 5:38–45, Romans 12:17–21, Psalm 46:9–10

I did some of my Clinical Pastoral Education Units in Gastonia. One of the units that I served was the Emergency Department. If there was an incident that was suspected to be gang related, they would ...

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Don’t Look Down But Up

Author

Rowan Williams

Keywords

Scripture

Hebrews 10:24-25, Philippians 2:3-4, Ephesians 4:2, Romans 12:10, 1 Peter 5:5

In his excellent book on the desert fathers, Where God Happens , former Archbishop of Canterbury Rowan Williams tells of an encounter between two monastic fathers. The first was Macarius, famous in...

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Monkeys & Comparison

Author

Brian Zahnd

Keywords

Scripture

2 Corinthians 10:12, Ecclesiastes 4:4, Romans 12:6, Philippians 2:3, 1 Corinthians 12:18-20, Proverbs 14:30, James 3:16

In their book Friend and Foe, social psychologists Adam Galinsky and Maurice Schweitzer cite a study by Emory University scientist Frans de Waal regarding comparison. De Waal trained capuchin monkeys ...

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Almighty God, harsh words and personal

Author

Laura B. Murray

Keywords

Scripture

1 Peter 3:9, Matthew 5:5, Romans 12:17-19, Colossians 3:12-14, Proverbs 15:1, Matthew 5:44, Ephesians 4:29, Proverbs 18:21, Matthew 12:36

Almighty God, harsh words and personal attacks can bring out the worst in us. We find ourselves spending energy on thoughts of retaliation and plans to protect ourselves. Father forgive us. We long to...

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What Drives Success?

Author

Donald Miller

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 6:25-34, Galatians 1:10, Philippians 2:3-4, Matthew 23:1-12, Romans 12:2

In his book, Scary Close , Donald Miller acknowledges that over time he developed a mask, or a persona that kept even those closest to him from experiencing with him. As he began to peel back layers ...

relationships and community on Discomfort

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