Relationships and Community on Disagreement

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Genesis 37:3-4, 18-20, Exodus 32:19-21, 1 Kings 12:6-11, 1 Kings 14:1-3, 13 , Philippians 2:3-4, Psalm 133:1

The reason we fight with each other, and often believe the worst about each other, is that we form convictions about things for which we care deeply. Unfortunately, we all care deeply about different ...

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The Key Word in a Disagreement

Author

Buster Benson

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Scripture

Colossians 3:12-13, Matthew 5:44, Ecclesiastes 7:9, Philippians 2:3-4, James 3:17, Proverbs 15:1, 2 Timothy 2:24-25

The key word in our definition of a disagreement (an unacceptable difference between two perspectives), isn’t “difference.” It’s “unacceptable.” Once the clash between perspectives becomes unacceptabl...

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5 Steps to Handling Strife Within the Church

Author

Mike Kenyon

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Scripture

James 4:1, Philippians 2:14, 1 Corinthians 14:33, James 1:5

Conflict in Ministry Have you ever whispered to yourself, “I didn’t sign up for this?” I confess those words have passed through my mind more than once over the years. When I started out in ministry...

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Love Does not Insist on Its Own Way

Author

Dave Peterson

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Scripture

1 Corinthians 13:4-7, Philippians 2:3-4, Colossians 3:12-14, John 13:1-17, Luke 10:25-37, Genesis 37:50, 1 Peter 4:8

Once, while on vacation, on our way to church, Terri and I got into a disagreement over something. When I felt I was losing, to make my point, I stopped the car and got out. We were on a country road....

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Never Attack an Individual

Author

Justin Trudeau

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Scripture

John 13:34, Colossians 3:12, Matthew 5:9, 1 Peter 2:17, Galatians 3:28, Proverbs 15:1, Philippians 2:3

In a speech given at his father’s (former Canadian PM Pierre Trudeau) funeral, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau shares this story about an experience he had with his father when he was a young b...

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The Two Hermits Attempt to Quarrel

Author

Rowan Williams

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Scripture

Philippians 2:5-7, James 4:1-2, 2 Timothy 2:23-24, Romans 12:17-18, Matthew 5:39-40, Proverbs 17:14

Two hermits lived together for many years without a quarrel. One said to the other, “Let’s have a quarrel with each other, as other men do.” The other answered, “I don’t know how a quarrel happens.” T...

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Author

Bob Goff

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Scripture

Philippians 2:3-4, Galatians 2:20, James 1:19-20, Romans 12:3, Proverbs 15:1, 2 Corinthians 5:17, Matthew 11:28

Arguments won’t change people. Simply giving away kindness won’t either. Only Jesus has the power to change people, and it will be harder for them to see Jesus if their view of Him is blocked by our b...

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Two Stout Monks

Author

Brennan Manning

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Scripture

Exodus 16:2-8 , Numbers 14:26-30 , Proverbs 17:22, Philippians 2:14-16 , Psalm 106:24-27, James 5:9

In his Rule for monasteries, St. Benedict considered grumbling a serious offense against community life. He wrote, “If a disciple grumbles, not only aloud but in his heart … his action will not ...

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Judgment and Joy Don't Go Together

Author

Jacob Traeger

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Scripture

Philippians 2:14-16, James 5:9, Numbers 14:27, 1 Corinthians 10:10, Luke 5:30, 1 Timothy 2:8, Exodus 15:24, Luke 6:37, Matthew 7:1-5, 1 Corinthians 5:12

Judgment and joy don’t go well together – no, judgment leads to grumbling. I’m sure you’ve met people in your life who are hard to please – maybe even your parents, or your boss. People for whom n...

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Author

E. M. Cioran

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Scripture

Acts 18:1-3, Romans 16:3-4, 1 Samuel 18:20, Ephesians 4:2, Philippians 2:3-4, 1 Peter 4:8

Love is an agreement on the part of two people to overestimate each other.

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The Discipline of Not Having the Last Word

Author

John Ortberg

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Scripture

Matthew 5:9, Colossians 4:6, Proverbs 17:27, Ecclesiastes 3:7, 1 Peter 3:15, Philippians 2:3

In his book, Soul Keeping, pastor John Ortberg describes his mentorship by Dallas Willard early in his ministry. The following vignette occurred while Willard was teaching a philosphy course at the Un...

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Monkeys & Comparison

Author

Brian Zahnd

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Scripture

2 Corinthians 10:12, Ecclesiastes 4:4, Romans 12:6, Philippians 2:3, 1 Corinthians 12:18-20, Proverbs 14:30, James 3:16

In their book Friend and Foe, social psychologists Adam Galinsky and Maurice Schweitzer cite a study by Emory University scientist Frans de Waal regarding comparison. De Waal trained capuchin monkeys ...

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Author

Kevin G. Ford

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Scripture

Genesis 11:1-9 , Judges 17:6 , Exodus 32:1-6, Philippians 2:3-4 , Luke 12:16-21, Psalm 133:1

The problem is not recognizing the importance of the individual. The problem is the glorification of the individual. When the individual self is glorified over the greater good of the community, right...

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Showing People Louis

Author

Mike Cosper

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Scripture

1 Samuel 16:7, Matthew 6:1, John 12:43, Galatians 1:10, Philippians 2:3

In his excellent book, Recapturing the Wonder: Transcendent Faith in a Disenchanted World , Mike Cosper shares a short vignette about the comedian Louis C.K.* Louis CK tells fans he meets in pu...

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Choosing a Hymn (Is Not as Easy as You Might Think)

Author

Hayes Parish Register.

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Scripture

Romans 12:16, Philippians 2:3, 1 Corinthians 14:26, Psalm 15:1-2, Psalm 100:1-2

From the Hayes Parish Church on 18 March 1749: The Clerk gave out the 100th Psalm, and the Singers immediately opposed him, and sang the 15th and bred a disturbance.

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Who Determines Your Behavior?

Author

The Pastor's Workshop

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Scripture

Romans 12:1, Matthew 5:44, Proverbs 15:1, 1 Peter 3:9, Luke 6:31, Galatians 6:9, Colossians 3:12-13, 1 Corinthians 13:4-5, Genesis 50:20, Philippians 2:3-4, James 1:19-20, 1 Samuel 24:17

Some years ago, the syndicated newspaper columnist Sidney J. Harris shared an interesting anecdote from one of his friends. Each evening, this friend would stop at the same newsstand to buy a newspape...

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Author

John Milton

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Scripture

Matthew 5:5, Jeremiah 9:23-24, Galatians 5:19-21, 1 Peter 3:9, Philippians 2:3-4, Romans 12:19, Proverbs 16:18

But what will not Ambition and Revenge Descend to? Who aspires must down as low As high he sor’d, obnoxious first or last To basest things.

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The Line Runs Through

Author

Fleming Rutledge

Keywords

Scripture

Colossians 3:12-14, 1 Peter 3:8-9, Philippians 2:3-4, James 1:19-20, Ephesians 4:2-3, Romans 12:16-18, Romans 3:23

In any polarized situation, the overriding human tendency is to draw a line with oneself and one’s allies on the good side and the opposing party on the wicked side, with very little attempt made by e...

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Author

Helen Keller

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Scripture

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, 1 Corinthians 12:12, Hebrews 10:24-25, Romans 12:4-5, Philippians 2:2, Matthew 18:20

Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much. While they were saying among themselves it cannot be done, it was done.

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Put the World’s Enemies in a Room Together

Author

Lori Gottlieb

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Scripture

Proverbs 17:17, 1 Peter 3:8-9, Philippians 2:3-4, Romans 12:10, Colossians 3:12-13

During my training [as a therapist], a supervisor once told me, “There’s something likable in everyone,” and to my great surprise, I found that she was right. It’s impossible to get to know people dee...

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The Politics of Ministry Book Review & Quotes

Author

Stuart R. Strachan, Jr.

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Scripture

Philippians 2:21

Picture this: you are just about a year into your first call as a minister. Everything seems to be going swimmingly. You caught up with a seminary friend over the weekend and you slightly brag about h...

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May we be no one’s enemy, and may we be

Author

Eusebius of Caesarea

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Scripture

1 Peter 3:8-9, Philippians 2:3-4, Ephesians 4:32, Luke 6:27-28, Galatians 6:2, Proverbs 17:9, Matthew 5:9

May we be no one’s enemy, and may we be the friend of all that is eternal and abides with Christ. May we never quarrel with those nearest us; and if we do, may we be reconciled quickly. May we love,...

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Honoring and Leaving

Author

A. J. Swoboda

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Scripture

Exodus 20:12, Jeremiah 35:18–19, Proverbs 22:1, Philippians 2:3–4, Matthew 6:1, Psalm 37:5–6

The challenge each of these faced in their deconstruction—and what we may face—is walking the tightrope between becoming our own person and honoring our past. In The Homeless Mind , sociologist P...

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Author

Theophan the Recluse

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Scripture

Philippians 2:5-8, 1 Peter 5:5, Isaiah 66:2, Matthew 11:29, James 4:7

The invincible weapon against all our enemies is humility.

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We confess, loving God, that we are not

Author

Chip Hardwick

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Romans 3:23-24, 1 John 1:9, Ephesians 1:7, Philippians 2:3-4, James 4:6, Romans 12:2

We confess, loving God, that we are not a society of saints, but a fellowship of sinners. We are the forgiven, who still need forgiveness. We are the redeemed, who are still being redeemed. We do not ...

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Lord of Hosts, We come before you today

Author

Stuart R. Strachan, Jr.

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Scripture

Micah 7:18-19, Colossians 3:13, Matthew 5:44, Philippians 2:3, Romans 5:8

Lord of Hosts, We come before you today in a tone of solemnity. We recognize that while it was Judas who betrayed you for 30 pieces of silver, that we often betray you as well. We know what is right,...

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When Helping Hurts: An American in the Philippines

Author

Duane Elmer

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Scripture

Proverbs 28:26, Proverbs 3:5-6, Proverbs 14:12, Philippians 2:3-4, John 9:2-3

An American woman visiting the Philippines, observed an elderly woman on the outskirts of Manila. She looked poverty-stricken and walked with the help of a cane down into a ditch alongside a main road...

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The Danger of Service Alone

Author

Thomas Merton

Keywords

Scripture

Philippians 2:3-8, Colossians 3:23-24, Mark 10:42-45, 1 John 4:19, Luke 10:38-42

The fact that our works are done in the service of God is not enough, by itself, to prevent us from losing our interior life if we let them devour all our time and all our strength. Work is good and n...

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Author

Martin Luther

Keywords

Scripture

Philippians 2:12-13, John 14:21, Romans 2:13, 1 John 3:18, Luke 6:46, Matthew 7:21, James 1:22

The kingdom of God does not consist in talk, but in power, that is, in works and practice. God loves the 'doers of the word' in faith and love, and not the 'mere hearers,' who, like pa...

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Author

Mike Krzyzewski

Keywords

Scripture

Galatians 4:4-5, Titus 3:4-7, Philippians 2:8, Hebrews 2:14-15, 17-18, Hebrews 4:15, 1 Peter 4:8, Matthew 5:9

[I] try to get into their world a little bit [by listening to hip-hop], because if they’re only adapting to you and you’re not adapting to them in some way, I don’t think you’ve developed a relationsh...

relationships and community on Disagreement

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