Relationships and Community on Difficult People

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Author

Bob Goff

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 25:35-40, Luke 19:1-10, 1 Peter 3:9, Romans 12:20-21, Matthew 5:43-44, 1 John 4:18-19, Acts 7:

What I’m learning about love is that we have to tackle a good amount of fear to love people who are difficult. .

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Compassion for a Bully

Author

Chuck DeGroat

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:7, Philippians 2:1-2, James 3:17, Proverbs 17:9, Luke 6:36, 1 Peter 3:8

I love the following story because it illustrates both our natural defensiveness when we are attacked and the potential for transformation. As the illustration demonstrates, this is only possible when...

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Author

Kevin Keith

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 18:21-35, Luke 17:3-4, Colossians 3:9, 23-24, Ephesians 4:25, Proverbs 10:9, Proverbs 12:22, Proverbs 24:26, Proverbs 6:17, 1 Peter 3:10-12, Luke 6:35, Acts 20:35

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you w...

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Put the World’s Enemies in a Room Together

Author

Lori Gottlieb

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 17:17, 1 Peter 3:8-9, Philippians 2:3-4, Romans 12:10, Colossians 3:12-13

During my training [as a therapist], a supervisor once told me, “There’s something likable in everyone,” and to my great surprise, I found that she was right. It’s impossible to get to know people dee...

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Don't Take Conflict Personally

Author

Stuart R. Strachan, Jr.

Keywords

Scripture

1 Peter 3:8-11

Called to Pastor, Inclined to Argue When I was graduating from college in the mid-2000s, I was encouraged to take a career test to determine where my personality type would fit in the working world. ...

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Who Determines Your Behavior?

Author

The Pastor's Workshop

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:1, Matthew 5:44, Proverbs 15:1, 1 Peter 3:9, Luke 6:31, Galatians 6:9, Colossians 3:12-13, 1 Corinthians 13:4-5, Genesis 50:20, Philippians 2:3-4, James 1:19-20, 1 Samuel 24:17

Some years ago, the syndicated newspaper columnist Sidney J. Harris shared an interesting anecdote from one of his friends. Each evening, this friend would stop at the same newsstand to buy a newspape...

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Almighty God, harsh words and personal

Author

Laura B. Murray

Keywords

Scripture

1 Peter 3:9, Matthew 5:5, Romans 12:17-19, Colossians 3:12-14, Proverbs 15:1, Matthew 5:44, Ephesians 4:29, Proverbs 18:21, Matthew 12:36

Almighty God, harsh words and personal attacks can bring out the worst in us. We find ourselves spending energy on thoughts of retaliation and plans to protect ourselves. Father forgive us. We long to...

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The Discipline of Not Having the Last Word

Author

John Ortberg

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:9, Colossians 4:6, Proverbs 17:27, Ecclesiastes 3:7, 1 Peter 3:15, Philippians 2:3

In his book, Soul Keeping, pastor John Ortberg describes his mentorship by Dallas Willard early in his ministry. The following vignette occurred while Willard was teaching a philosphy course at the Un...

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The Line Runs Through: Sermon Illustration Tuesday

Author

Stuart R. Strachan, Jr.

Keywords

Forgiveness

Scripture

Romans 12:2, 1 Peter 3:8-9, Proverbs 4:23, Ephesians 6:12, Romans 7:21-23, Jeremiah 17:9

If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the lin...

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The Line Runs Through

Author

Fleming Rutledge

Keywords

Scripture

Colossians 3:12-14, 1 Peter 3:8-9, Philippians 2:3-4, James 1:19-20, Ephesians 4:2-3, Romans 12:16-18, Romans 3:23

In any polarized situation, the overriding human tendency is to draw a line with oneself and one’s allies on the good side and the opposing party on the wicked side, with very little attempt made by e...

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The Quasimodo Complex

Keywords

Scripture

1 Samuel 16:7, James 2:1-4, 1 Peter 3:3-4, Proverbs 31:30, 1 Samuel 16:7, Psalm 139:13-14, Leviticus 19:14

Two decades after I worked with the airmen, I read a fascinating article, “The Quasimodo Complex,” in The British Journal of Plastic Surgery, Two physicians reported in 1967 on a landmark study of e...

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Not Interested in Being Meek

Author

Jerry Bridges

Keywords

Scripture

Titus 3:2, Colossians 3:12, 1 Peter 3:4, Matthew 11:29, James 1:21

A friend of mine who is an entrepreneur was listening to a CD of a series of messages I had given on the Beatitudes. When he came to meekness, he told me, he skipped over it. He wasn’t interested in b...

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God our Father We confess to you and to

Author

Jacob Traeger

Keywords

Scripture

James 1:19-20, Proverbs 15:1, Romans 12:17-21, Matthew 5:38-39, Luke 6:35-36, Matthew 18:21-35, Matthew 5:43-44, 1 Peter 3:9, Genesis 45:4-8

God our Father We confess to you and to one another That we have been quick to anger And slow to mercy We have paid back abuse with abuse Hatred with hatred And violence with violence The world does n...

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Author

John Milton

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:5, Jeremiah 9:23-24, Galatians 5:19-21, 1 Peter 3:9, Philippians 2:3-4, Romans 12:19, Proverbs 16:18

But what will not Ambition and Revenge Descend to? Who aspires must down as low As high he sor’d, obnoxious first or last To basest things.

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Author

Ambrose of Milan

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 6:14-15, Proverbs 20:22, Colossians 3:12-13, Romans 12:19, 1 Peter 3:9, Ephesians 4:31-32, Matthew 5:44

No one heals himself by wounding another.

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Revenge Doesn’t Say

Author

Miroslav Volf

Keywords

Scripture

Leviticus 24:19-21, Romans 12:17-21, 1 Peter 3:9, Matthew 5:38-39, Proverbs 24:29, Matthew 26:52-54, Deuteronomy 32:35

In Exclusion and Embrace , Yale professor Miroslav Volf reflects on the themes of revenge, mercy, forgiveness and grace. Volf, who grew up in war-ravaged Croatia, speaks from a place of deep concer...

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Bitterness only Hurts Ourselves

Author

R. T. Kendall

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:19, Matthew 6:14-15, Ephesians 4:31-32, Colossians 3:13, Luke 6:37, Romans 12:17-21, 1 Peter 3:9

When we are bitter, we delude ourselves into thinking that those who hurt us are more likely to be punished as long as we are set on revenge. We are afraid to let go of those feelings. After all, if w...

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May we be no one’s enemy, and may we be

Author

Eusebius of Caesarea

Keywords

Scripture

1 Peter 3:8-9, Philippians 2:3-4, Ephesians 4:32, Luke 6:27-28, Galatians 6:2, Proverbs 17:9, Matthew 5:9

May we be no one’s enemy, and may we be the friend of all that is eternal and abides with Christ. May we never quarrel with those nearest us; and if we do, may we be reconciled quickly. May we love,...

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Tearing the Leech Off

Author

Gary Preston

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 6:14-15, Ephesians 4:31-32, Colossians 3:13, Romans 12:17-21, 1 Peter 3:9, Proverbs 19:11, Luke 17:3-4

There’s a story about a traveler making his way with a guide through the jungles of Burma. They came to a shallow but wide river and waded through it to the other side. When the traveler came out of t...

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On Turning the Other Cheek

Author

Walter Wink

Keywords

Scripture

Isaiah 2:4, James 1:19-20, Proverbs 20:22, Matthew 5:9, Luke 6:27-29, 1 Peter 3:9

Many of those who have committed their lives to ending injustice, simply dismiss Jesus’ teachings about nonviolence out of hand as impractical idealism. And with good reason. “Turn the other cheek” su...

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No Further Instructions

Author

Charles Swindoll

Keywords

Scripture

Colossians 3:12-13, James 1:19-20, Ephesians 4:31-32, Luke 6:27-28, 1 Peter 3:9

A successful Irish boxer was converted and became a preacher. He happened to be in a new town setting up his evangelistic tent when a couple of tough thugs noticed what he was doing. Knowing nothing o...

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Author

Candice Bergen

Keywords

Scripture

Psalm 90:17, 1 Peter 3:3-4, James 1:10-11, Ecclesiastes 3:11, 2 Corinthians 4:18, Isaiah 40:7-8, 1 Samuel 16:7

Though beauty gives you a weird sense of entitlement, it's rather frightening and threatening to have others ascribe such importance to something you know you're just renting for a while.

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Adapted from Psalm 25:6-9; 1 Peter 3:18

Keywords

Scripture

Psalm 25:6-9, 1 Peter 3:18

Leader: "Remember your mercy, O Lord, and your steadfast love, for they have been from of old. Remember not the sins of my youth or my transgressions; according to your steadfast love remember me...

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Happy Marriages

Author

John Gottman and Nan Silver

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 31:11-12, Ephesians 5:25-28, Colossians 3:19, 1 Peter 3:7

Happy marriages are based on a deep friendship. By this I mean mutual respect for and enjoyment of each other’s company. These couples tend to know each other intimately—they are well versed in each o...

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Pursuing Truth Over Revenge

Author

Stuart R. Strachan, Jr.

Keywords

Scripture

Micah 6:8, Luke 23:34, Exodus 23:5, 1 Peter 3:9, Proverbs 24:17, Luke 6:35

During that time there was a pastor named Peter Miller, and all through his ministry in a small town in Lancaster County, he had a neighbor who took great pleasure in mocking and ridiculing Miller and...

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Father, as we go to our homes and our

Author

Caryl Mickelm

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 13:1-23, Isaiah 6:8, 1 Peter 3:15, Galatians 6:9-10, John 13:34-35, Colossians 4:5-6

Father, as we go to our homes and our work this coming week we ask you to send the Holy Spirit into our lives. Open our ears- to hear what you are saying to us in the things that happen to us and i...

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A Prayer attributed to St. Francis

Keywords

Scripture

Matthew 5:9, Romans 12:18, Galatians 5:22-23, 1 Peter 3:8-9, James 3:17-18

Lord, make us instruments of your peace. Where there is hatred, let us sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is discord, union; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope...

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The Evangelist Wasting his Time

Author

Richard J. Mouw

Keywords

Scripture

Proverbs 25:11, Ecclesiastes 3:7, Isaiah 50:4, 1 Peter 3:15, Colossians 4:5–6, Psalm 19:14

As a college student, I was returning to school one year on a Greyhound bus. One of the other passengers was a middle-aged man who seemed to be making the rounds, engaging various people in quiet conv...

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Author

Keywords

Scripture

Romans 12:19, Matthew 6:14-15, Colossians 3:13, Ephesians 4:32, 1 Peter 3:9, James 1:20, Proverbs 20:22

By forgiving another, I am trusting that God is a better justice-maker than I am.

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Author

N. T. Wright

Keywords

Scripture

1 Peter 3:11, Philippians 4:8, Romans 12:18, Micah 6:8, Psalm 34:18, James 1:27, Isaiah 61:1-2

When God wants to sort out the world, as the Beatitudes in the Sermon on the Mount make clear, he doesn’t send in the tanks. He sends in the meek, the broken, the justice hungry, the peacemakers, the ...

relationships and community on Difficult People

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