All that I ever really needed to know about uncivil language I learned in the fifth grade. At a small Dutch Calvinist school in a New Jersey city, I was playing with other students just before classes...
James 3:13-4:3; 7-8a, James 3:13-18, James 4:1-3, 7-8, James 1:16-27, Galatians 5:22, Proverbs 1:7, Psalm 37:4, James 4:3, Philippians 2:1-5, Psalm 121:null, Psalm 30:null, Jeremiah 11:18-20, Psalm 54:null, James 1:16-27, Galatians 5:22, Proverbs 1:7, Psalm 37:4, James 4:3, Philippians 2:1-5, Psalm 121:null, Psalm 30:null
James' Intent James, the brother of Jesus, the leader of the earliest Christian church in Jerusalem, writes this letter to scattered Jewish believers who were going through very difficult times. ...
Leviticus 24:19-21, Romans 12:17-21, 1 Peter 3:9, Matthew 5:38-39, Proverbs 24:29, Matthew 26:52-54, Deuteronomy 32:35
In Exclusion and Embrace , Yale professor Miroslav Volf reflects on the themes of revenge, mercy, forgiveness and grace. Volf, who grew up in war-ravaged Croatia, speaks from a place of deep concer...
James 3:13-4:3, 7-8a, James 3:13-18, James 4:1-3, 7-8, James 1:16-27, Galatians 5:22, Proverbs 1:7, Psalm 37:4, James 4:3, Philippians 2:1-5, Psalm 121:null, Psalm 30:null, Jeremiah 11:18-20, Psalm 54:null, James 1:16-27, Galatians 5:22, Proverbs 1:7, Psalm 37:4, James 4:3, Philippians 2:1-5, Psalm 121:null, Psalm 30:null
Preaching Commentary James' Intent James, the brother of Jesus, the leader of the earliest Christian church in Jerusalem, writes this letter to scattered Jewish believers who were going through...
I was listening to a lecture on friendship to prepare this sermon and the speaker used the movie The Bride of Frankenstein as an illustration. Now, for this to work, you have to put the movie Young...
1 Peter 3:9, Matthew 5:5, Romans 12:17-19, Colossians 3:12-14, Proverbs 15:1, Matthew 5:44, Ephesians 4:29, Proverbs 18:21, Matthew 12:36
Almighty God, harsh words and personal attacks can bring out the worst in us. We find ourselves spending energy on thoughts of retaliation and plans to protect ourselves. Father forgive us. We long to...
When you take "personal" attacks personally, you unwittingly conspire in one of the common ways you can be taken out of action-you make yourself the issue. Attacks may be personal, understan...
Proverbs 17:22, Romans 12:10, Proverbs 27:17, Proverbs 15:22, Matthew 11:15
A productive disagreement yields fruit: the fruit of security, by removing a threat, reducing a risk, resulting in a deal, or concluding with a decision; the fruit of growth, by revealing new informat...
Proverbs 18:13, Matthew 18:16, Romans 12:18, Proverbs 20:3, Matthew 5:24
Most quarrels are due to a misunderstanding, and the misunderstanding is due to our failure to appreciate the other person’s point of view. It is more natural to us to talk than to listen, to argue th...
Philippians 2:5-7, James 4:1-2, 2 Timothy 2:23-24, Romans 12:17-18, Matthew 5:39-40, Proverbs 17:14
Two hermits lived together for many years without a quarrel. One said to the other, “Let’s have a quarrel with each other, as other men do.” The other answered, “I don’t know how a quarrel happens.” T...
Anxiety sparks when a perspective we value bumps into another perspective that challenges it in some way. If we find this new perspective to be unacceptable, that’s when our “Someone is wrong on the i...
Matthew 6:19-21, Matthew 16:26, Philippians 3:7-8, Proverbs 16:8, Luke 12:15, Proverbs 23:4-5, Ecclesiastes 4:7-8
Sometimes our successes can be more devastating than our failures. We fight, strain, and struggle in pursuit of something or someone that looks to be good, and after days or months or years, we obtain...
I always cheer up immensely if an attack is particularly wounding because I think, well, if they attack one personally, it means they have not a single political argument left.
Romans 12:19, Matthew 5:23-24, Colossians 3:8, Ephesians 4:26-27, Proverbs 15:18, Proverbs 14:29, James 1:19-20
Of the seven deadly sins, anger is possibly the most fun. To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to com...
2 Corinthians 5:18, Psalm 34:18, Romans 12:18, James 1:19-20, Proverbs 15:1, Matthew 6:14-15, Colossians 3:13
Philip Yancey writes of a friend whose marriage was choked by hostility. One night the friend reached the breaking point: “I hate you!” he screamed at his wife. “I won’t take it any more. I’ve had eno...
Proverbs 3:5-6, Romans 8:37-39, Psalm 91:1-4, James 4:7, 1 Peter 5:8-9, 2 Corinthians 10:3-5, Matthew 6:9-13
We Christians must be armed and expect every day to be under continuous attack. . . . At such times our only help and comfort is to run here and seize hold of the Lord’s Prayer and speak to God from o...
Colossians 3:12-13, Matthew 5:44, Ecclesiastes 7:9, Philippians 2:3-4, James 3:17, Proverbs 15:1, 2 Timothy 2:24-25
The key word in our definition of a disagreement (an unacceptable difference between two perspectives), isn’t “difference.” It’s “unacceptable.” Once the clash between perspectives becomes unacceptabl...
My friend Eugene has a black belt in martial arts. During a sermon taping, I once held a block of wood as tightly as I could, right in front of my face, while Eugene did a 360-degree spin and splinter...
The British romantic poet Lord Byron (George Gordon) grew up with the disability of clubfoot, which kept him from engaging in many of the activities and joys of childhood. He was nevertheless, a perso...
Uncontrolled temper is soon dissipated on others. Resentment, bitterness, and self-pity build up inside our hearts and eat away at our spiritual lives like a slowly spreading cancer.
Leviticus 19:15, Proverbs 18:17, 1 Kings 3:9, Matthew 7:1–5, John 7:24, Psalm 141:5
At a recent gathering of seminary professors, one teacher reported that at his school the most damaging charge one student can lodge against another is that the person is being “judgmental.” He found ...
1 Corinthians 6:1-8, Matthew 18:15-17, Romans 12:18, James 3:17-18, Proverbs 15:1
Former Supreme Court Associate Justice Antonin Scalia argues how Christians ought to resolve conflict based on 1 Corinthians 6: I think this passage [1 Cor. 6:1–8] has something to say about the pro...
Luke 6:37, Ephesians 4:31-32, Psalm 37:8, James 1:19-20, Colossians 3:13, Proverbs 15:1
One elderly monk in his community used to show his displeasure with other monks in a highly creative way. As you may know, most monastic communities chant the psalms several times a day together in ch...
Mark 7:20-23, Proverbs 4:23, James 1:14-15, Luke 6:43-45, Colossians 2:23
One afternoon, I was playing with my son in our living room when I suddenly smelled something burning. I stood up and walked around, nose high in the air, sniffing furiously. My wife smelled it too, s...