humor on Genetics

Peter Ustinov, the British actor, director, and playwright, once received an indignant letter from the headmaster of his son’s school. The letter complained that his son frequently disrupted lessons b...

My wife was grading a science test at home that she had given to her elementary-school class and was reading some of the results to me. The subject was “The Human Body,” and the first question was: “N...

Being omniscient, God knew Murphy’s Law. On the Eighth day of creation, God said, “Okay Murphy, take over." (for humor)

Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it.

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.

In the beginning, the universe was created. This has been widely regarded as a bad move. (for contrast, and humor)

They say that in Martin Luther’s class on Genesis, a smart aleck student asked, “Dr. Luther, since you know so much about the book of Genesis, tell us: what was God doing all that time before God crea...

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

In the beginning there was nothing and God said, “let there be light.” There was still nothing, but you could see it better.

Why would a lazy guy become a parent of five? Then again, why would creative people who inherently don't like change and criticism become writers, actors, or comedians? There's something about...

Scott Weems, author of Ha! The Science of When We Laugh and Why, explains that humor stems from our brains being confused about how to respond, which is why we often laugh at inappropriate times. “Wha...

From there to here, from here to there, funny things are everywhere.

A family from a remote area was making their first visit to a big city. They checked in to a grand hotel and stood in amazement at the impressive sight. Leaving the reception desk they came to the ele...

“People say, “You must have been the class clown.” And I say, “No, I wasn’t. But I sat next to the class clown, and I studied him.”

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go

I married my wife for her looks, but not the kind she’s giving me lately.

What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.

A man went in for his annual checkup and received a phone call from his physician a couple of days later. The doctor said, “I’m afraid I have some bad news for you.” “What’s the news?” the man asked...

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

George Harrison memorial tree, killed by beetles

Archelaus the 5th century (BC) king of Macedon, was once having his hair cut. His barber, quite verbose like many others in his profession, asked King Archelaus how he would like his hair cut. His res...

The powers of a man's mind are directly proportioned to the quantity of coffee he drinks.

You have as much laughter as you have faith.

As we wait, it is critical that we keep our sense of humor in the fullest meaning of that word. When laughter goes, so does hope. When God reaffirms his promise to Abraham and Sarah, he restores not o...

At what age do you think it's appropriate to tell a highway it's adopted?

Bureaucracy is the art of making the possible impossible.

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

Nothing is ever done until everyone is convinced that it ought to be done, and has been convinced for so long that it is now time to do something else.

Marriage is tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers.

I saw a study that said speaking in front of a crowd is considered the number one fear of the average person. Number two was death. This means to the average person, if you have to be at a funeral, yo...