Third Third Difference: A Great Way to Begin Serving Your Third Third Disciples

These days, more and more pastors are looking for ways to serve their third third congregants, that is, folks roughly 55 years of age and older. It’s common for me to hear from a pastor who says something like this, “We have quite a few mature adults in our congregation. They are welcome to participate in all we do at church. But we’re not really serving them in a way that addresses their particular place in life. I’d love to see us do something, but honestly, I’m not sure where to start.”

When a pastor talks about where to start, often they’re thinking in terms of some new program that serves folks in the third third of life. New programs can be great, but a helpful starting point in third third ministry does not have to be complicated. In fact, it can require very little additional time and no additional money. It’s something that can be started with a week or two of modest preparation. And it works in churches small, large, and in between. 

I should mention here that many churches are already doing a good job caring for their older adults who are experiencing physical and other challenges, the sorts of things that often come when one is quite advanced in years. But, for the most part, churches have not been doing much to help their third third folks live as active, growing, fruitful disciples of Jesus in their distinctive season of life with its distinctive challenges and extraordinary opportunities.

In a moment I’m going to suggest something that pastors and churches can do to encourage and instruct their third third folk in whole-life discipleship. Actually, this suggestion would be good for the whole congregation. It’s never too early to get people thinking about how following Jesus faithfully and fruitfully is a lifelong experience.

Inspired by This Time Tomorrow

But that’s not the main point of this article! I want to encourage you to experiment with something like This Time Tomorrow, but with your third third folk in mind, especially those who are retired. The name “This Time Tomorrow” may not work in this case because retirees often have more freedom in their schedules. Twenty-four hours after they’re in worship, third third folk may be having coffee with a friend instead of going to work, not that there’s anything wrong with that of course. But what we want to do is interview third third folk about the things they are doing as an expression of their purpose and calling. We want to learn about how they are expressing their discipleship.

Third Third Difference

As I talk with lots of third third folk, I hear how so many are living for purposes beyond their own enjoyment, contrary to the popular cultural narrative of retirement. Almost every retired person with whom I speak is doing something out of a sense of calling, something that is not only personally rewarding but also contributing to God’s work in the world.

Third Third folk want to make a difference that matters in the world. If churches would provide a platform for people in the third third to talk about how they’re living as disciples of Jesus, this would surely inspire and instruct other older adults. But it would also help those who are younger begin to think about their future differently. Wouldn’t it be something if 45-year-olds and 35-year-olds and 25-year-olds and even 15-year-olds began to think of the third third of life as an extraordinary time to make a difference for God in the world?

Instead of the title “This Time Tomorrow,” I would suggest the name “Third Third Difference.” The word “difference” comes from the common desire of older adults to “make a difference that matters.” It can be out there in the wider world. It can be within the life of the church. It can be family related. Many third thirders are making a difference in a variety of settings. For “Third Third Difference,” it would be best if they focus on one thing they’re doing.

The questions asked in Third Third Difference are similar to those in This Time Tomorrow. They include:

• In this season of life, when you’re not working full-time, what are you doing to make a difference?
• What helped you to know that this is where you should focus your time and energy?
• What are your challenges and joys associated with this difference-making effort?
• How can we pray for you?

Of course, you can edit these questions as you see fit.

It’s always a good idea to talk in advance with the person to be interviewed, helping them to focus, to be brief, and so forth. One of the easiest ways for a pastor (or other church leader) to recruit folks for Third Third Difference participation is by making it a habit to ask folks the same questions they’ll be asked in worship. Not only does this help them to be prepared, but it also helps you to get to know your older adults and what’s going on in their lives. Plus, it can give you a whole bunch of new sermon illustrations and ways of connecting with your third third folk as you preach.

If you try out Third Third Difference in your church, I’d be most interested to hear the results. There is always room for improvement and growth, so I’m wide open to comments both positive and negative, and to any suggestions you might have. Just email me at [email protected].

This is the fifth article in a series on the Third Third of Life by Mark D. Roberts. If you are interested in reading the other articles in the series, here they are in order:

1. Gray Hair in Society and Church: Silver Tsunami or Silver Opportunity?

2. Pastoring Folks in the Third Third of Life: What I’m Learning

3. Third Third Ministry and the Intergenerational Opportunity

4. Third Third Preaching by Mark D. Roberts

5. Third Third Difference: A Great Way to Begin Serving Your Third Third Disciples

Dr. Mark D. Roberts is a Senior Strategist for Fuller’s Max De Pree Center for Leadership, where he focuses on the spiritual development and thriving of leaders. He is the principal writer of the daily devotional, Life for Leaders, and the founder of the De Pree Center’s Flourishing in the Third Third of Life Initiative.

Previously, Mark was the Executive Director of the De Pree Center, the lead pastor of a church in Southern California, and the Senior Director of Laity Lodge in Texas. He has written eight books, dozens of articles, and over 2,500 devotions that help people discover the difference God makes in their daily life and leadership.

With a Ph.D. in New Testament from Harvard, Mark teaches at Fuller Seminary, most recently in his D.Min. cohort on “Faith, Work, Economics, and Vocation.” Mark is married to Linda, a marriage and family counselor, spiritual director, and executive coach. Their two grown children are educators on the high school and college level.

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