Grief in Modern Life

In 2011, the online publication, Slate, surveyed its readers about their experiences of grief. Apparently, grief was a hot topic for many readers because they received nearly 8,000 responses within one week.

One of the contributors who published the results is a psychologist who specifically studies grief. In reporting the results of the survey, she noted that one of the strangest aspects of grief is the gap between what we experience privately and what we express to others in public. The result of that gap is that grief can be a deeply isolating experience. We feel alone like we are the only ones going through it and no one else really understands.

The survey revealed the following:

One-third of the respondents reported they had experienced their loss eight or more years ago, suggesting the ongoing presence of the felt loss.

Only 7 percent of mourners felt it was “completely true” that they received adequate support from others.

A significant theme emerged in how people felt their grief made others uncomfortable. People grieving felt others rapidly tired of their sad mood and the support they did received quickly waned under the expectation that they move on.

Nearly 30 percent felt alone with their grief most of the time.

13 percent said they felt alone in their grief all of the time.