Naaman: A Parable of Leadership

Leadership Trauma is Taking a Toll

The word is out.

According to Barna, as of March 2022, the percentage of pastors considering quitting full-time ministry within the past year sits at 42 percent. Stress, isolation, and political division factor into pastors’ desire to quit. Nearly three in four pastors sometimes feel emotionally exhausted and over half feel isolated from others. Leadership struggles within the Church also reflect a trend in leadership generally, where four out of five young adults (18-35 years old) affirm—and nearly half strongly affirm—that “society is facing a crisis of leadership because there are not enough good leaders right now” [1] Much of these trends are connected to a condition coined as leadership trauma. This occurs when contexts in the past (formation), the present (challenging conditions), and the future (fear of failure to meet expectations) subject leaders to emotional and spiritual pressures that undermine their capacity to lead and relate well to their colleagues.

And yet, so many struggling leaders find it difficult to get help. One common reason is their sense of self-sufficiency—they believe they can figure out and solve what is happening by themselves. Take Eric, for instance. The leader of a church plant, Eric was on the verge of burnout after two years of effort. He started with what he thought were all the ingredients for success: the proper training, the right team, sufficient resources, and the blessing of his elders, who declared him anointed for the task at such a time as this. And things started well. In just over a year, the numbers grew such that the fledgling church had to seek a larger space than his living room. However, the transition brought on greater management responsibilities. His relationship with one of this team members—a longtime friend—began to fray over differences in their approach to ministry. The excessive hours began to affect precious time with his wife and children. And with new members coming in with their expectations, Eric was exhausted trying to meet everyone’s expectations.

Naaman: A Trapped Leader

The scenario of being trapped in a leadership role while dealing with something utterly unfixable has a scriptural precedent. 2 Kings 5 tells us the story of Naaman, commander of the armies of Aram, a persistent enemy of Israel and Judah. Naaman was a highly successful military leader and probably had a significant role in subduing Israel and Judah under Aramean control. “But,” as scripture succinctly puts it, “he had leprosy” (v. 1). And that one word put everything into a terrifying perspective in the ancient world. It was a slow death sentence. It would eventually isolate him (rob him of community or the ability to do any work), incapacitate him, and eventually kill him.

For many struggling leaders, Naaman’s external affliction is a metaphor for an internal affliction of the soul. All the burdens, internal conflicts, resentment, disappointment, and unmet expectations eat away at us from the inside, with no apparent relief in sight.

Like Naaman, asking for help is hard. Eric feared that admitting his need for help would undermine his leadership or, worse, call into question whether he was called to this work in the first place. He did not want to disappoint ministry supporters and funders. He started to communicate less with his team, who saw troubling signs, and despite their insistence that he take a break, he would not listen. Things came to a head when he snapped at his youngest daughter while on the phone. She missed her dad and only wanted his attention. His instant regret was compounded by the memory of the same thing happening between him and his father. Eric realized that something needed to change. But how?

Unexpected Hope

For Naaman, hope and help emerged amid this dark situation. An enslaved Hebrew servant girl captured by the Arameans on one of their raids into Israel whispers to Naaman’s wife of a prophet in Israel who serves a God who can cure him of his disease. Naaman had a choice to make. To find his cure, he would have to leave his familiar surroundings and go to the land of the people he has subjugated. To his credit, he chose to go, but not without holding on to some of his pride, privilege, and self-sufficiency.

Like Naaman, just because we are desperate does not mean we want to give up control. We might acknowledge a course of action; we might be aware that we have to do things outside of our usual methodology, and we will have to be unconventional in our search for healing. But we often will insist on controlling the narrative. Wielding his status, Naaman obtains official documents of his king to present to the king of Israel, demanding access on his terms and bringing his chaotic, noisy retinue of attendants and a lot of cash. It’s the ultimate expression of entitlement because his identity rested in his past accomplishments and self-sufficiency wrapped around his power, wealth, and status. It was a futile attempt at control, to show somehow that he should have a role in his healing.

When God speaks and tries to get through to us, what is critical is both what God says and how he says it. God is multidimensional in his communication and has no shortage of ways he can get through to us. Be alert to the many ways that God speaks. If we believe that he must work in a way that we expect, we limit him.  

When Naaman shows up with his noisy theme music, Elisha, working prophetically through God’s instruction, does not come out to greet him. Instead, he sends a servant with specific instructions that he is to bathe seven times in the Jordan River. This offends Naaman, who expected Elisha to come out and grant proper acknowledgment of his status. His subordinates, fortunately, persuade him to return by appealing to his sense of self-sufficiency. “If the prophet had told you to do some great thing, would you not have done it? How much more, then, when he tells you, ‘Wash and be cleansed’!” (v. 13). Naaman was offended because what was required did not depend upon his status or abilities; it was something anyone could do.

God is all too familiar with our attempts at controlling our narrative. If Naaman was to experience healing, he had to surrender this false identity and submit to the work of God through the prophet. Here again, God works through his wise and courageous followers who know more about Naaman than Naaman knows about himself. Again, Naaman could have blown them off, but he was a desperate man. He finally surrendered.

Who Speaks Truth to You?

Here, we must ask the question: have you given anyone the right to speak the truth to you at any time or place, no matter what?

Because here’s the thing: God’s work with Naaman was not simply to heal his leprosy. God also wanted Naaman, all of him, from head to foot, not just his body but his heart, mind, and soul. God alone has the power of life and death and can heal completely. And that could only happen with Naaman’s surrender of his self-sufficiency. Naaman needed his wife, a foreign enslaved girl, and courageous subordinates around him who could speak the truth. Naaman needed to leave his familiar surroundings and relocate to a far-off place to meet the strange prophet who would not even come out to meet him. God could heal and restore him only when he gave up all his pretensions of being self-reliant and self-sufficient.

Naaman was a different man afterward. God’s healing of his body led to the restoration of his soul, and he became a follower of the God of Israel. His request of Elisha to take a load of Israel’s soil was from the ancient superstition that deities were location-bound—they had to be worshipped on their own soil. Elisha realizes the beginnings of Naaman’s relationship with God. He sends Naaman in peace, knowing that the God of all things restored his body, personal, work relationships, and community. The blessing of God did not stop with Naaman but radiated outward from him as a new follower.

Similarly, Eric’s crisis with his daughter prompted him to seek help to identify the roots of his leadership trauma. This included how he exhibited similar dysfunctional ways of relating like his dad. With the support of a counselor, Eric realized he had to face how his stress and pain harmed his family. He also addressed the weight of ministry responsibilities and allowed his team to share the load now and in planning for the future. Because Eric took the risk to be transparent about his struggles with his old friend, their relationship was reconciled.

God's Way of Leadership

I am increasingly convinced that the Church and its people are rediscovering God’s way in leadership. This is marked by no longer prioritizing efficiency and getting things done at the expense of depersonalizing those we lead. This new way is the way of the Holy Spirit, where we acknowledge our limitations and vulnerably submit to the directives of the Holy Spirit. We are willing to invite others to speak courageously and truthfully into our lives and hold us accountable. This will not happen because of our willpower but because of the power of God as we submit ourselves to his leading. May that be so.

[1]“Pastors Share Top Reasons They’ve Considered Quitting Ministry in the Past Year,” Barna Group, 27 April 2022. https://www.barna.com/research/pastors-quitting-ministry/.